I fink we're distracting them from bumping the proverbial uglies
he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
everytime she opens her mouth i wish that i was deaf
don't worry dude, we didn't fuck on your bed out of respect for you
couldn't find a condom?
basically
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We got jeff a deep fryer for his bday. So far the count is two potatoes and your iPod.
Monday is now my bitch. I just did 20 naked push ups on the bar for $20
I keep shaking cocoa puffs out of my hair. Best Sunday Funday ever.
Literally told everyone you're my idol cause you ate a chicken nugget off a sword
He lit a shoe on fire and tried putting it out by peeing on it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
I just got a snapchat of a flaccid penis with the caption "happy belated valentine's day." What did I do to deserve this
i got kicked out of the casino for drunken disorderly conduct because i kept stumbling into old people and one of them told on me. as the boucer was taking down my information so i could no re-enter i ripped my id out of his hands while yelling fuck you.
Hey, I was just wondering why i dont have a shirt on, why im cuddling with a furnace, why im in my own basement, and where my car is.
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
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