i just puked in front of my entire floor a girl on crutches asked iof i needed help hahaaa fuck ima damn fool
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
This hotel is not contributing to my sobriety, they have 4 kinds of free wine and beer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My gynecologist just commented on how well my vagina was waxed
You "were" hungover, which is past tense. So that gives you no excuse not to go out tonight.
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
How much do you charge for your Funyun and beer delivery service?
You understand the drunkenness of my drunkenness
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You tried to pay for our cab with the 2 dollars you got from selling your natty ice outside the strip club.
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
drunk in woodshop so don't even say "I SAWWW THIS COMING." I know you're thinking it.
Did my roommate wake up in your girlfriend's apartment in drag again?
we woke up when the front wall of the house caught fire.
And the you walked in and said to the only under age dude "IM NOT SLEEPING WITH YOU TONIGHT!!!" You may not have high standards but thanks for not sleeping with my brother!
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