Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
i think the date started going downhill when i mentioned how many therapists i have
She fucked me because she said I looked like Neil Patrick Harris
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
Aaaaand then she sang MDMA to the tune of the YMCA song, with appropriate gestures.
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
It was dark, she woke me up, gave me a blowjob and then whispered in my ear: do you know who I am?
I THINK I JUST JOINED A GANG. PLEASE PICK ME UP.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Update: I may or may not be in a cult
Update #2: I may or may not be the leader of said cult
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
Then, he ate me out while I watched Bo Burnham. Best. Night. Ever.
The neighbors ahemed the WHOLE time. Their kids are the ones that scream loud enough for me to remember my birth control. It's payback!
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
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