If I was on drugs, this would be amazing
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
he nicknamed his dick "too big to fail"
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think it was you who decided that coming home at 3AM and cooking eggs topless was the best way to end our night. Eating the scrambled eggs off each other's boobs, that was ellie's idea
well i just got discharged from the hospital after getting pegged in the head by a t-shirt gun so thats how my night was.
I put the condom across her upper lip. It was like a mustache of a job well done.
Did you mean to cry when you finished last night? Or were you just that drunk?
Well, while we went through airport security, I found out Mom got her clit pierced, so there's that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My husband was abducted by a group of disco dancers in the parde and danced off down the street. If you see him, tell him to Hustle on home and clean the cat box. #MardiGras
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
Who the fuck hid 3 Zimas under my pillow?! Icing doesn't count when it's 8am the next morning and everyone's left and you've passed out on your couch. Currently chugging 2 of 3...
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
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