matts gf stood and watched my naked ass gather my clothes off his floor this morning. sweet.
I'm peeing chunks and puking liquid. Did I at least have fun last night?
i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
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I woke up covered in my own vomit with a pocket full of napkins. I guess I knew I would need them, but was not coherent enough to use them before passing out.
If he starts "inventing" things cut him off. The last thing he invented was chocolate chip green beans and he destroyed my kitchen
Welp, she's chewing our paper towels again. She's like an obnoxiously hot puppy
I found bruises on my neck from barfing out the window.
False alarm it was margarita mix all over my hands not blood
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We got to the party at eleven, and the host was already in the hospital from being stabbed. And she brought the stabber home with us when we left.
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
THAT'S NOT NICE
NEITHER WAS PROMISING NOT TO TAKE MY SISTER'S VIRGINITY, THEN PROMPTLY DOING SO
HE IS. YOU SHOULD TOUCH HIS BACK.
IT IS A COURTSHIP RITUAL.
THE MUTUAL BUTT TOUCH IS SACRED.
I’m honestly just flattered that you think I could make PornHub’s Top 10.
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