I'm not a real person
I'm sorry, everyone knows that
i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
she gave me a handjob while we were watching elf.... it's that time of year again!!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
Just considered the plausability of using my detachable showerhead as a beer bong. Has my life really devolved to this?
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
I just farted a soft, gentle fart and it made me think of the eye puff glaucoma test at the eye dr. I hope that's not fart air they use for those. And yes, I'm texting you from the toilet and yes again, I'm high.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I love you with the passion of a thousand FUCKBOYS during the height of week 1 texting
I ended up snorting coke while wearing a Bavarian dress and I feel like I need to reevaluate my life
He just sprayed AXE in his mouth to get rid of his bad breath... THAT DRUNK
Oh, the accent alone guaranteed a bj. It was when he started drunkenly singing in PERFECT PITCH that I knew I was fucking him.
I often worry that if I get famous, people from my past will recognize me and start talking to the media
the person she was housesitting for had a christmas card from charlie sheen on the fridge so we fucked on the couch and just slept in the bed
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