so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
Turned the water balloon filler into a jungle juice fire extinguisher. Please call me tomorrow afternoon and make sure that i'm still alive.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
...that's why he's not doing anything with his life except breeding geckos
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
I just woke up to three dick pics. Apparently in my blacked out state. I was asking for them as the new valentines day card.
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
Was I asleep on the ride home?
Yea, then when I tried to hold your head up on a turn, you round house punched me in the face.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told him to just roll me a blunt and put it in a heart shaped box.
Did I fall on/off the boat yesterday? Cuz my right leg looks and feels like if it got hit by shrapnel.
In local news "Man Stabbed With Golf Club" next person who tells me this is a safe place to live gets punched...
I'm killing it this week, I've peed my pants and put my vibrator into the washing machine.
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
We couldn't find her anywhere. Finally, I saw her sitting in my bathroom floor spraying hair mouse into her mouth and whispering "I fucking love whipped cream." WHAT DID YOU GIVE HER AND CAN I HAVE SOME?
Randomize