its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
I am standing at the lion i publicly humped last night. i am mortified.
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
While you were in the ER we decided to tailgate in the parking lot until security told us that's not allowed.
It's like we come as a package. Your slogan should be "be in my family, sleep with my roommate."
My slogan can be "bonding the family together. One dick at a time."
No, that was the night I helicoptered my dick to oncoming traffic. Im talking about the night I ran naked down the street.
Yea, she's 42 I'm 23. Girls our age are terrible. All they need is a divorce and a bottle of wine
I feel like I got run over by a bus full of inebriated Scotsmen on the way to a soccer riot.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So hungover im counting my own breaths to make sure im not dead. The odds hurt.
I texted him in the morning wishing him a day as spectacular as his dick was.
I'm sitting naked on my bathroom floor and it remind me of us.
That's my way of saying I miss you
Can you come over?
Sex??
Sure but there’s also a squirrel in my garage I need you to take care of.
when your dumb AF ex “accidentally” venmos you $50 and texts you asking for it back..... —sorry I accidentally deleted your number and cashed out
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP 😂😂😂😂
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