I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
You drank the expired grape juice because you were convinced it had fermented into wine...you have a problem.
The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints.
I tried calming him down but his eyes are rolling to the back of his head and he's yelling "COMA WEED!"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
We left the knife in your bed.
Either I'm paranoid or I swear my parents rigged my house so you can never sneak in or have the munchies without being loud.
Was my mother there when I broke the stipper pole?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She followed me back, then proceeded to find my room, get her panda suit on? And then raid my room and pass out on my couch... what the fack do I do now?!?!
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
Blood work from physical was all good, apparently heavy alcohol use agrees with me
I went to her house she had a kid pool in her living room watching the vacation channel drinking rum out of the bottle saying" life is what you make it. Mines a vacation!!!"
Note to self:A blacklight toga party at a frat house is a bad idea. Some things cannot be unseen
I wrote a pretty good eulogy, too. Motherfucker pastor had no sense of comedic timing.
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