No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
My aunt totally just drunk dialed me when i was super stoned, it was so intense
There should be a blender full of rum, tea, and grape jelly in the freezer. She thought it was a good idea until she blew chunks.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you're my knight in shining pee-resistant armor
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
You know what i just remembered? I asked the 8 ball if i was gonna get kicked out this semester before any of this stuff happened and it said yes. ITS REAL.
Being drunk is way better. Seriously, I just licked your brother to make sure my spit was actually real.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know, I kept pretending that I was riding an elephant during. It was actually really fun, but you can't tell him that!
Found my id. It was in the cats litter box. Seriously what was last night.
I had a dream that I had to take a breathalyzer but then it turned out to be a bong....why can't that be real life?
I'm so high I have morphed into the monopoly man. Or maybe the Pringles guy. I don't know but I have a mustach now
You ate all the burritos in sight....I cant take you to mexican restaurants anymore
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
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