I totally thought the tree was playing the guitar
Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
I'm pretty sure my roommate has taken plan B more times than i've had sex. Not sure how that makes me feel.
About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
If you were a real friend you would have told me you saw me in a porno despite how awkward of a convo it is. You act like I should always know when I'm being recorded.
I could have made money off of that but no you had to wait 2 years to drunkenly tell me this shit.
Most of the bar is playing trivia I'm playing destroy a relationship in twenty questions
Sometimes you get drunk and fall out of a car. I never said it was glamorous.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my binge eating and her being stoned all the time has reduced us to a bowl of chinese candies, frozen bacon and a stick of butter, we do however have enough alcohol to start our own liquor store.
I apparantly wanted to name her baby garbage
Deciding whether to take my sex toys home for Christmas will be the biggest decision I make this holiday season
Thank you for deleting me from Instagram. Also, I'm carrying your child. Happy new year!
How can I prove that I give 401k advice and not handjobs?
Do you remember last night?
Just that I fell down a hill with my penis out and the emt talked to me.
Randomize