We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
i wanted to iron the shorts i'm wearing. but i'm high and lazy. so i'm using my hair straightener. in bed.
Whatcha textin bout Willis?
She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
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So I fucked that hot french guy last night
You do know he's the one who threw up on our table, right? You get to clean it up.
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
The EMTs said they would give me as many blankets as I wanted if I didn't pee in the ambulance. They even turned on the sirens.
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
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It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
I think I just danced on the bar. With a man named Alabama.
Thank you for turning 21. I'm going to love reading your texts.
Over 50% of the drunkest nights I have ever had began with me saying "I'll just drink my dinner" to you.
Boss out of town. Had 2 beers for lunch, a long walk and a bowl...and then in he comes. Blamed obvious intoxication on my pain meds. Back at the bar. This is one of those bad judgement days.
Last night I made the hotel shuttle driver take me to Walgreens for birth control, and Pringles.
They were both high priority
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
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