Why is my head in the toilet this morning but there is vomit behind the toilet
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.
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At CVS buying just condoms. The guy behind me is buying just hotdog buns. There was a silent moment of understanding between us.
No driving. The car is spinning. I am praying for mcdonalds.
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
Mr. Clingalot just ran from our apartment. What the hell?
I started to cry afterward and mumble random things. Examples: "God, please don't make me be so gay anymore" and "my mom is going to be so proud of me for fucking a dude this time." It was that or let him stay the night and cuddle. I mean, fuck that horrible shit I'm a girl that needs her space.
She's cute, but batshit. Like some kind of dominatrix disney princess.
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I watched you fall asleep, sitting up, eating a cinnamon roll. You proceeded to wake up...smile at your cinnamon roll, ask it how it got into your hand and then began eating it again. You asked me if you were ridiculous last night, define ridiculous.
I said "sucks to suck" to a cop last night. We've been snapchatting.
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
Sometimes I just take my boobs out of my shirt so they can get some fresh air
If it's any consolation she turned out to be has a collection of clown dolls she talks to crazy. And the cops knew why I was calling when she key locked the door from inside.
He stopped the gas pump at 69 and gave me my receipt. He wants it.
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