The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
Registered for next semester classes drunk. Let's hope I didn't accidently sign up for history of dinosaurs again...
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know your in for a great weekend when you buy the booze already in crutches
He said female orgasms are a myth and refuses to even try to give me one.
No night ever ends well that starts with "you know what this needs? More tequila".
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
I just sat in the bathtub with the shower running so I could eat the whole box of mega stuffed Oreos. What am I doing with my life
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
when you're a senior and the freshman guy you wake up next to asks who you are, you DO NOT give him your real name.
That moment when you notice a tiny IR camera pointing at you, in your bed, at the apartment you found on Craigslist.
we broke the bed, curtan rods, a dresser drawer, and unless I didn't notice it before, we put a hole in the wall. This is why he and I have to fuck in motels.
I just sneeze out a chunk of leftover pickle I threw up last night. dont you try and tell me your day is going worse
These last few days with George, grandma, and now Carrie all dying have been pushing me further and further into rum's sweet embrace.
He tried to brush a hair off my cheek, but turns out it was just a freakishly long chin hair. So no, we didn't bang.
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