The jonas brothers playing in your laptop. This is why guys won't sleep with you...
my dad just encouraged me to do a kegstand
So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
I found a girl on our couch wearing lederhosen this mornig... I dont know if i should be impressed or ashamed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
new years resolution: more sex, less car punching, more chipotle.
They're calling for 20 inches of snow but I'll have a dirtbike for emergency trips to the liquor store. Even if I crash it won't hurt.
Normally I would go for him, but there's just way too much vodka under the bridge for that
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
Someone please drive out to my house to bring me a beer.. There are some in the fridge but I just can't get up
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just got my beard fondled by a drunk chick outside the venue. I feel slightly violated. And I think her boyfriend wanted to fight me.
Wow has his pick up routine ever gotten bad. He is trying to use cheese as a way to flirt with the waitress
Oh man, he played the Harvarti cheese card and it didn't work. Now he is flailing
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
I wore sunglasses to take a shower. I might be hungover.
sorry for pouring tequila vodka and whiskey down your throat and left you to sleep on a table
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
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