Dude!! Mom just asked me why you have 'boobies' hahaha
I hate my life
he just found out his girl is having a boy. he's probably googling "Ed Hardy diapers" as we speak.
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
SURVIVED FINALS. CAN'T DIE FROM ALCOHOL POISONING. NOTHER SHOT. CAPS.
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I'd like to be considered more than just his fuck buddy thanks. IVE BEEN RISKING PREGNANCY FOR SEVEN GODDAMN MONTHS I DESERVE THE TITLE OF GIRLFRIEND
At one point, the guy you were fucking high-fived with the guy I was fucking. We should hang out with them again?
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
and a jello shot exploded in my bra last night. Now I have blueberry smurfette boobs. Awesome.
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Okay. I am working on pulling a tooth out of my mouth. Call me.
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
We are gonna sacrifice to and pray to every god in this world that he doesn't find out about her sleeping with his old roommate.
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
so in 24 hours i have gotten caught having sex in my car by a cop, almost burnt off my vag, almost got hit by a semi, and got fired. awesome.
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