he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
Ate lunch. Still drunk. Keep forgetting I'm in Texas but then I look around at the people and remember.
You took a bag of frozen peas to bed wiith you "to help with the inflamation".
All I heard was "I swear it'll be funny" and then we were in jail.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I distinctly recall there being a "I can't be dead 2maro" stipulation to going out last night. There's been a breech of contract
You were doing karaoke. Then you screamed "SHOUTOUT TO ADAM LAMBERT" and started making out with the very surprised looking guy next to you.
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
I don't know which part of you thought this was funny but it's fucked up to wake up in that much fluff and now we don't have a couch. Fuck you.
They're playing house music in my dentists office again, wtf is wrong with these people. That's not the music you want to get a root canal to
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
The guy whose porn password I use finally renewed his membership. Lazy fucker had been slacking all summer.
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
your mom was just petting me...I am strangely comfortable with it
you said, "I wonder what your mum is doing right now." in the middle of sex, of course I threw up on you.
I just came in my own mouth don't ask me how cuz it really hurt and felt good at the same time.
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