??? When I first met her at the bar, she told me she was 23. After I bought her 3 shots of tequila, she told me she was really only 21. When we went back to my house, she said she was really only 19. She's still sleeping next to me butt naked. I'm afraid if she opens her mouth again I could be looking at 10 years.
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
sarcasm needs its own font
i don't want a singing card. it disturbs my hangover. give me a pack of cigs taped to a bottle of wine and fuck me without a condom. happy vday baby.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
Im celebrating the fact that the one guy who has ever denied me has just come out of the closet
Grad practice is like a live scrapbook of my drunken sexual encounters
New life rule, no banging opera singers. I might be a little deaf now
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well it's official, last night I hooked up with the third girl from the apartment downstairs.
Dude that's a hat trick!
I know, I tossed my hat on the floor as I was walking out.
I'm sorry I never said I wasn't coming home last night. To my defense I did type and send a text, only I was too drunk to realize I sent it to the guy I was with instead of you.
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
You can't talk like Dr. Evil to me five minutes after the greatest orgasm of my life.
i'll talk to you in three hours when you've stopped foaming at the mouth and your eyes have rolled back into place
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
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