I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
Oh my god. Just had sex with this girl on the boardroom table at my work at midnight (win!) just realized I left the condom wrapper on the table (lose!)
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That was around the time you tried to kick me out for being rude to your fish.
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
My inner buddhist recalls, "You receive the d when you aren't looking for it, only when the d wants you." True story.
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
I have a bruise on dick where you tried to "high five" me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
I can't decide if I'm depressed or if this is just what life without a bidet feels like.
That last one reminds me of the time we smoked that foot-long joint and by the time we'd finished we were so stoned we applauded it.
I'm pretty sure I went in the girls bathroom and vomited everywhere then looked for a urinal for like 20 minutes
If you can give me an orgasm, you'll get a trophy.
I DEMAND FORESKIN
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