Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
fuck you guys, stop putting fake babies in my car the cops came again.
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
She just took off her shirt and jumped in the kiddie pool. We're not leaving.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You didn't want to have sex last night because you said your grandpa just died and you didn't want him watching..
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
Highlight of the night: paying my cell phone bill at the bar... I need to get laid.
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
I'm trying to get fucked by 4 girls here, and you're worried about verb tenses?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't believe I ever hated her sister or friends. They got her some sexy sexy ass lingerie for the honeymoon. I think I love them bitches
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
I just bought a bottle of lube for my car.
You told the bartender at least five times that you were naming your son "Jagermeister" but you would use the bartender's name "Fernando" as his middle name. You were drunk.
he brings me coffee and gets a blow job. not sure if I trained him or he trained me or it's simply mutually beneficial beautiful.
This girl in my class is lecturing my professor about zombies. It has been going on for 15 minutes.
Zombies?
Zombies.
Randomize