I have carpet burn on my ass, I'm rethinking my decisions last night.
May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
I hate drunken dyslexia, i thought she said "someone to do" not "something to do" long story short i now have a restraining order.
We had phone sex and he came in his sink. i will never eat off one of his plates again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
You told the cashier at McDonald's not to smell the ones cause you had just got back from the strip club. Good deed.
I swear if he puts my hand anywhere near his dick tonight I'm "accidentally" leaving all my rings on
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
I think I just pulled an onion peel off my boob from sleeping on their kitchen floor
My mom just came upstairs handed me an Adderall and asked if I could help her wash the ceilings
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
Grandma is high again and locked herself in the house
That’s the third time this month he’s hooked up with a girl by telling her it’s his bachelor party, and he’s not even dating a chick let alone engaged.
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