Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
i'm starting to get pissed at how pandora is trying to force coldplay on me
I woke up at 5 this morning face down on my bed with gummy bears stuffed in my leggings. Yeah.
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey they cleaned all the blood out of the elevator. Also could you pick up some nachos?
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
do you think a sharp knife would stab through a cheese suit?
All I want in life is to get high, take a shower, and him to go down on me. Simultaneously. That's legit my idea of heaven.
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Screw disneyland. This military base is the happiest place on earth. Even unnatractive dudes are completely fuckable in those uniforms, im never leaving
i actually texted him "nice to see you" but then there was a saved draft "i think about you when i get off." dodged that bullet...
I ate vegetarian today, so I deserve a beer.That's my justification.
It's like you're the voice of my soul.
the evidence suggests last night I either took a bath in beer or drank 18 beers while in the bath. either one sounds good to me. sad i don't remember it
When you accidentally text the wrong guy for a dick pic and your surprised you get one In return. He just got on my "to do" list
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
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