Just incase you were wondering, the count of ladies who have perioded on chairs at our fine restaurant is now at 3.
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
you finished all 5 burgers, started crying tears of joy, and then claimed the tears were actually just 'meat sweats' from your eyes
this is really not the time to pretend we have morals
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He broke up with me because "we're at different points in our lives" I think it's because he saw a drag queen with their hand halfway down my pants
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
Sleeping in a car was not on my list of plans for the night.
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
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She kissed me, then said "mmm your face tastes like it needs my pussy on it."
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
YOU RAISED A SWORD OVER YOUR HEAD AND SCREAMED AT HIM WHAT THE FUCK ELSE DID YOU THINK WOULD HAPPEN?!
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
Like I'll lick your nuts to make you feel better if you don't get it
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
Randomize