I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
I've been reduced to Capt. Morgan and Golden Girls reruns. Ugh.
her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
my girlfriend just informed me I need to get tested and so do you
girlfriend?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
She's cool and all but if she eats my food again I'm gonna fucking drop kick her ass. No one touches my lunchables. NO ONE.
The night was crazy enough that we did a workout. Instructed by the bouncer at 2am
He told me that he's proud of our abnormalcy as a couple. I think it's the most romantic thing he's ever said.
This is getting exciting. I almost wanna turn off all the lights, get some popcorn, and stare at my phone screen to see if she's going to say yes or not
And on a much sadder note, I'm way to drunk for this right now
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