Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
six shots in, he is hammered and doing stretches before each shot
you know you were way too high when you wake up next to a handwritten list of all the things you'd do for a Klondike bar
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, she literally stopped, mid fuck said "I want soup" got off my dick and make top ramen.
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
I will be naked everywhere
No she left bc the of pic I have of my mom in my bathroom. She thought it was my gf
Why the hell do you have a picture of YOUR MOM in your bathroom?!?!
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
God, please protect all woman from micro-penises
This is my last chance to be the first person to fall off this roof.
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
...I just melted into my bed. I am one with the bed. I am 600 thread count.
It true. It written in the Bible.
Yes I remember that, right next to the passage where jesus said unto his disciples, pop molly, fuck bitches amen
Randomize