All I want to do right now is burp, puke, and fart. In that order.
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
The bottle I was drinking out of splintered on the bottom, there was glass in my hand, I pulled it out with my teeth... Not the best night for Drunk Kevin
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
Also adulthood=replacing meals with bourbon. And not getting your hair caught in a fan.
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
I built a fence. For the bunnies we're going to adopt. I'll fill you in when you get home.
i love how you just walk into that dealer's house every time without knocking, yet you don't even know his name
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
You're the only guy I know who could convince a lady at the pharmacy to trade you her pain pills for your antibiotics.
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
so... i have a picture of you and three other girls making kissy faces at this giant stuffed banana you're holding. however, you seem to be violently screaming at it.
Those bitches did NOT have my back.
Hey, before I head out, whats your policy on casual drug use and one night stands?
There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.
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