Words of wisdom-never eat a peanut-butter covered banana on a construction site ever again
Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
Just coerced a Santa to buy me a handle. Tis the season.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After 2 hrs of driving around looking for him, we just found him sleeping in the bed of my truck with the cover closed, cuddling with the spare tire.
Even though ive seen her get fisted by another girl at a party, shes still a doctor.
At what point did you actually think that you could throw knives safely?
What was the name of that place where we saw that concert? It was like a warehouse and some guy was living in the loft above the stage...
It's called: a legit place to drop acid.
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
What is it in my brain that makes me look at a penis and think "that belongs in my mouth"?
If you find my integrity anywhere, please tell it to come back home
On a scale of 1 to hungover I’m definitely throwing up at the office today.
I'm too depressed to drink my wine. That is what I would call a serious problem
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
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