Crying babies in a bar. Really?
And she just changed the baby's diaper on the table. It's killing the beer garden.
nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
I'm actually glad you're quitting. Now there's one less person at work who's seen me naked.
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Its as if he has to do the exact opposite of what I tell him. Don't come in my eye, pfshh it's in my eye. Don't come on the cat, pfshh it's on the cat.
we've decided to start cutting you off when you can't figure out how to work an ipod.
I will now refer to my life as before and after I used Astroglide for the first time
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
Drunk me cleaned my room for me. Needless to say our relationship has improved greatly
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm in a pile of cheezits at an unfamiliar location watching dateline on tlc. Stage an intervention.
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
I got laxative. And a toothbrush. Because who wants to buy just laxative on a Friday night?
I bought us both waterproof cases so we can sext through FaceTime in the shower.
Next. Level. Shit.
Do you think I'm short enough to dress up in a ghost costume and go trick or treating and have people believe that I'm actually a child?
I just thought you should know that you should be proud of your dick. It's pretty much perfect. Just, ya know, by the way.
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