that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
awkward like he asked me out for a "rest of the summer make out buddy" thing and I kind of had a female testicle retreat moment
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
ever had your bank call you to verify the 4 seperate bar transactions from the night before? I have
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
i just realized that the oil change sticker on my windshield is a day before the last time i had sex. I've driven exactly 10500 miles since.
you need to get laid.. and an oil change.
Did you rob me and blame it on the strippers?
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
I just threw up birthday cake.. who's birthday was it?
Only you would have a vasectomy while you're awake and report on the soundtrack first
Just jacked in the family restroom in the hospital while eating beef jerky and looking at reddit gone wild.
Just got drunk at the Cheesecake Factory again. Made me think of you.
That's the nicest thing anyone's ever said to me.
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
Randomize
