summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
New development. Drinking at work is so easy and awesome I might have to do it everyday.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I would personally love to see the surveillance video of me throwing my stuff inside, peeing on the sidewalk, then crying hysterically when I realized I locked myself out. Again.
Can you explain the plethora of sunflower seeds in the dryer?
Let's go dancing. I wanna sprain an ankle. And a labia. My labia or yours. I'm not picky.
Your level of morning after guilt is too much right now. Do less.
you were holding her above your head singing Circle of Life in what i assume was a Simba reference. then she smacked her head on a bar light and the bouncers kicked you out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just googled: how soon can I pee on a stick. What is my life coming to.
I smoked all his weed and he hasn't noticed yet. But I might need a place to crash when he does
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
MANY MANY THINGS AND MOST OF THEM ARE YOUR FUCKING FAULT
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
I did just chug a pint glass of wine during a solid round of masterbation, so I believe I am ready for bingo.
when your dumb AF ex “accidentally” venmos you $50 and texts you asking for it back..... —sorry I accidentally deleted your number and cashed out
Randomize