don't thank me. stop putting your penis in foreign objects.
My roommate was eating ketchup out of a bowl. Get me the hell out of here.
Medically YOU CAN'T BE AN ALCOHOLIC TILL 25!!!!! WE GET 3 BONUS YEARS!!!!
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
HES DOING PULLUPS BE STILL MY BEATING HEART
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's no discreet way to sneak a cucumber into the shower lol
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
Do you remember whose house we're in?
I love the barter system - he got laid and I got him to bring me some ibuprofen. A win-win really.
Had sex in a blanket fort. How was your weekend?
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
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