I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
Hunting for men at chipotle... I feel like I should be more disappointed that this is the way my life is going but I'm really just excited for the potential.
Oh and my new excuse for not being able to hook up is cholera, feel free to use it
so apparently going to a christian rock concert dressed as Jesus is horribly inappropriate.
Things I just found under my covers: protein bar, string cheese, vibrator.
That ACT prep teacher knew i was hung. I could see it in her eyes.
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
My kid made a secret wish that you have a baby... Make good choices today!
I really need to stop sending pussy pics if I'm going to be running for state representative in November
I didn't realize how much I relied on you for a reason to drink on tuesday
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
He totally fucked me in his Chewbacca socks
His mom knocked on the door during morning sex because we were being too loud...now i have to meet her for the first time
Randomize
