she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
he kept asking me if i had been in a pool or a lake recently, i didnt want to say i know where the swimmers ear came from. shower sex.
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
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When a chinchilla decides to sit on your face while you're getting head from its owner, you bond.
I'm proud of you, you were pretty classy last night, you didn't puke AND you didn't take off your shirt, except for those two times in the corner.
We can put you in charge of something
I can be in charge of being more wasted than anyone there so everyone feels comfortable being ridiculous
I think the moment I knew you were going to black out was when I told you how many shots you had already and you were shocked and then poured another one
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
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hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
So i came so hard i almost passed out, where has this vibrator been all my life?
When I woke up I had 6 missed calls making sure I was ok and asking if I remember showing my tits to a picture of her baby.
I’m on my third beer doing poppers in the shower to no doubt
she wouldnt leave because they were playing One Direction. I'm dating a thirteen year old.
It's less than a hour into 2020 and I already want to punch some people in the face
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