He's marrying her, which means that she is his most important person in the world, so you gotta deal with it...okay?
Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
if there werent so many compromising pictures of me in the hands of so many liberal friends, id consider going into politics
i'm surrounded by gay midgets. not sure if i'm bragging or asking you to come rescue me. wait for follow up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What am I legally allowed to do to a girl that is the equivalent of me punching her in the face?
I asked for a steak knife but the waitress could see in my eyes it was a bad idea
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
WTF YOU SHOULDNT BREAK A SWEAT TAKING A SHIT. MY BODY HATES ME.
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
A sexy devil squat down and peed in front of Tom Hanks from Castaway.
I am lonely and hungry. I need a girlfriend, but I'd settle for my mom.
Blow jobs in the hobby lobby parking lot, oh lawd there gonna pray for me when they review those tapes ...
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
Oh no...did you put star fish over your nipples again?
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