Earlier, I saw a homeless man that looked like Abe Lincoln, and I just saw a guy walk past wearing crocs and socks. I'm beginning to like this city less and less
How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
I totes stole your whore crown.
With great power comes great responsibility.
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fact: The drinking you do in college doesn't affect your liver in real life.
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
She bit a glass in half.
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't decide if the sex was so good I couldn't move, or if it was me being loaded on all the morphine that they shot me up with at the ER.
i'm in that phase where i'll swallow anything except food
Apparently I really was petting a bunny named lazarus in Jimmy Johns last night.
I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
Hey when you get home, can you do me a solid and throw one of your pregnancy tests on my bed?
EPT or First Response?
he said to "slap him" after he guessed the time correctly. i did.
Randomize