Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
Did you know nanny-cams work just as well for recording that blow job on the sofa?
do you think i can make that microwavable cake stuff with vodka instead of water?
you should probably use water
i dont have any
We just made mixed drinks in the bathroom of burger king. This is sad.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my shit smells like andre
i would only ever fuck harry potter if he was on a broomstick.
How long does it take to cook a corndog over a candle?
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
I'm playing a little game called "how many shots of jack can I take before I become a shit show tonight". All front row seats are sold out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
Ripped as fuck driving to get a portrait of my cat tattooed on my arm
I just set a bowl of cap n crunch on fire. That high.
I have good news and bad news. Bad news, she's not in porn. Good news, I found porn.
On a scale from 1-10 how wrong is it to request "I Hit It First" at my ex's wedding reception?
Definite 12.2 but worth it.
Dad is wasting no time getting back out there. Just walked in on him and a Twin Peaks waitress in the hot tub
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