pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
My mom assumed I was crying because he was leaving. Figured that was better than explaining my eye's sensitivity to semen..
So she just apologized to the fire extinguisher.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They thought "watering it down" meant adding more vodka
He stole a bottle of grenadine from the bar. And got arrested. His new cell mate is going to love his bright red lips.
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
The last thing I remember was paying off her younger brother not to judge me, then puking on his shoes.
the fat guy in me is very excited, and the skinny guy in me is very excited for the fat guy in me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Running late for a date because I couldn't get my clothes out from under the dude I spent the night with in time to leave when I planned. This is my life.
You cannot tell me you don't have a problem while crying pantsless on a stranger's sofa bed.
ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.
My butt remains clenched, sir.
2016 was supposed to be my year of being a ho, but I guess 2017 might be too.
I’m 37 with a career and a home and yesterday my niece set up Snapchat so I can sext with my 22 year old boyfriend/fuck buddy. Yes. Yes I’d say I need help?
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