She was lying in bed moaning while eating a Snickers and masturbating.
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
everytime she opens her mouth i wish that i was deaf
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
And on top of all this... he just told me to "chill my nips."
Who would win... a chainsaw pooping pterodactyl or a bear with machine guns for feet. big debate about this right now
Liz is crying about burritos again.
I just realized that at some point last night I told someone I would only be friends with 16% of them because the other 84% stole my people's land
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
I walked a mile in this weather wearing nothing but a toga. Zero fucks. Your move Mother Nature.
You kept trying to make cocktails with my protein powder last night...
Still drunk on my morning "run" which has turned into a walk. Just burped fireball
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
Randomize