Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
Swine flu. Run for my life!
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
you gave the police officer your chanel wallet and said 'just keep it the i.d. is fake too'.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
He asked me if we could throw a lingerie party together so I guess he's single again
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
Slow dancing with the chandelier.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've already agreed to hook up with 3 people tonight, and its not even 2:00 yet... I think this is what the path to success looks like.
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
I'LL COME GET YOU. GOTTA FIND A SUIT THAT COVERS TIT BRUISES FIRST.
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
Everyone I slept with in 2016 is getting a Christmas card from me. Because I'm an adult.
Congratulations on giving me my first and second hickeys last night. I made it almost 30 years without one, but who needs class these days?
Randomize