please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
I wish Michael J Fox could read me bedtime stories
He could rock you to sleep
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
True Life: I puke at bars and try to catch it in my hand...then walk away like it didn't happen
He gave me a book last time I slept there. Im beginning to feel like a really weird hooker. Like instead of money he gives me random shit he has lying around. like hamburger buns
the owner gave me a free bottle of vodka and a 12pack of red bull if i agreed to leave. my drunken antics are finally paying off.
I wish you would always start your sentences with "speaking of my clit..."
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Haha. I got you. I always pay you back somehow. Do you accept all major forms of payment: cash, taco bell, and patriotic underwear?
Can vaginas get frostbite?
He put a canoe in the lazy river at the water and started paddling away from security
Everyone here is taking crazy amounts of mescaline and I'm just over here like hey have you tried the pretzel rolls mmm
He was respectful of both me and my One Direction calendar.
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
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