Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes
I just had to tell her that no she really doesnt need to sneak pizza from mcmurrays out in a plastic bag for me later
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Dude. I kneed him in the face and gave him a black eye. It's like a constant reminder of our hookup. I feel like herpes. I never go away...
I guess our biggest consolation is that we haven't woken up in a hottub with a dead dude. Yet.
Dude, you punched me in the face bc I wasnt ordering your tbell fast enough. Then when you got it, you threw it out the window bc, and I quote, "OBAMACAREEEE!"
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
Also, did you really start discussing the weather in the middle of telling you my sexual fantasy about you?
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hey dude my crackhead idol just taught me a great way to tie shoes
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
I think I came out of my blackout as I was ordering wine from the private wedding reception.
You woke up at like 4 in the morning fell off your bunk bead, yelled at Nic for asking if you were ok, walked to the kitchen, pissed on the keg, and then looked at me and said "Still not worth it" then went back to bed.
Forget work, lets run away, rob banks, and have kinky sex with fuzzy handcuffs.
IT'S LIKE YOU READ MY MIND.
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