I recorded his drunk dial calls. My personal favorite was the one that began, "grab the bull by the horns and fuck his cock."
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
The stripper on stage Is eating a mozzarella stick while on the pole....that's a new level of I don't give a fuck
I had a dream that our used condom started talking to me. I told me that I did an amazing job, and told me that it saved me. From aids.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The bed I'm sleeping in has a headboard only handcuffs could love. I'm gonna pick up a local dude and wreck that.
I WAS JUST SITTING HERE BEING SNIFFED BY ODD WOMEN FOR A SOLID 5 MINUTES. My face was a twist of utter fear and confusion...
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
Apparently "I have the beer shits" isn't the excuse my boss wanted to hear. So sue me
I decided I was tough enough to wax my bikini area myself. Long story short, I'll be drunk when you get home
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
don't judge my taste in strippers
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
The Olympian is in my bed
Great, now even dream!me is a drunken borderline mess.
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
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