They upped the price of Plan B! Rite-aid is going to be the reason I have illegitimate kids.
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
He told me the escort brought him pizza. Can something be sad and awesome at the same time ?
Bitch, I been tryna reach you all day to talk to you about these Dorito tacos.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm pretty sure I'm the first person in the history of this college to rollerblade their walk of shame.
You're not stopping till I see you on the ground trying to hold on to shit
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
Apparently drunk me thought it was a good idea to buy $100 worth of band aids and stick them all over everything in the apartment.
Can you tell dad to stop liking and sharing porn on FB again?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
He started praying immediately after we hooked up, condom on and everything.
how drunk are you?
Several
Haha i really think theres no better way to tell a paramedic sorry for breaking your nose than a beautiful and healthy edible arrangement...
We lost you in the bar so we waited outside for you...next thing you know you kick open the doors and yell "I'M ALIVE"
I just discovered that jello shots are the best hangover cure
You said that last night when you did jello shots at 4am
Randomize