he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
She is going down in cock block history. He went in to kiss me and she threw her hand between our faces and yelled "DENIED!"
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I realize it truly is impossible to burrow under the grass like a mole. Let's not drink for at least another 3 days.
I never thought I would be having sex behind a shower curtain that wasn't in a bathroom.
I didn't realize how drunk I was until my vagina was in the snow.
Also I owe you 20 bucks, a clean towel and a glass of scotch. I'll even throw in a blow job
I woke up with a bagel in my mouth, still ate it. Free breakfast
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
Rob and I are cross faded and the only one taking care of us is a drunk person who's making us dance.
So drunk last night I reviewed my recent anazon purchase of secret deodorant. Trust me, it was eloquent.
Did you make it home alright?
No I'm sitting under a tree by a cricket. He's alone crying out for someone to Fuck him. This guy gets me.
I got really worried when i woke up and there weren't any missed booty calls from him between 3 and 5 am. Apparently his gf is in town ...
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
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