when you get a chance can you look up 'free abortion clinic' for me? cuz i dont think i'll be lucky enough for a second miscarriage.
Sitting in a bubble bath with my bong, how's your morning?
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
Bought two parrots for us. I'm keeping them at the Bellagio.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Seriously? He's going to use MY birthday sex as the opportunity to ask if he can pee on me?!? I let him, but wow talk about selfish.
Do something fun then. Blow up the house or whatever.
How have you survived this long?
Dumb luck and a deal with the devil.
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
Do you have any idea how hard it is to iphone keyboard type "roflcopter" when intoxicated?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
Chicks before dicks must only mean American dicks
Seriously just told the plant the cheese Pringles are mine.
I'm shaving my vagina to the lion king soundtrack. How's your 9am?
You sat down in the middle of the road and started crying. We told you "Get your ass up or we're leaving you here." You replied "They'll findddd meeeeee" and ran after us.
So on a scale of 1-10 how mad would you be if I sent you a picture from the inside of a strip club
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