I'm not unpopping my collar. This shirt is too expensive to crease.
Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
Her breakfeast in bed consisted of half a pop tart that I didn't want, and water that I slipped birth control into... Who says chivalry is dead?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
Lauren she was gnawing on a dresser. Gnawing. On. A. Dresser.
Note to self: You can't deep fry cheese-its.
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
You kept asking her which dick pills worked the best. She's a grandmother.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I fell asleep in the bathroom during my mothers dinner party with no pants on. Her friend walked In. I was told to not come back.
You know if we weren't hooking up I think we'd actually be friends
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
He shit in the fireplace
THERE HAS BEEN GRANDTHEFT IN THE HOUSE. SOMEONE STOLE THE BABYWIPES AND YOU NEED TO BUY MORE BEFORE WE LET YOU IN. oh and you have to take two shots before we'll let you in. with no chaser.
I can’t tonight. I’ve got to see about a penis
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