just threw up while drinking by myself. This is all your fault. You here = a good night, You not here = alcoholism
so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
By the grace of god and the ingenuity of Alexander Graham Bell, this text message is made possibe: YOU ARE A WHORE
She's an ex-convict. She actually got stabbed in the face with a pen while in prison. No big deal.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If someone would have told me in preschool that I was going to do him I would have said no
Hey, remember when Hot Stuff played in the back of the ambulance? Or no, cause of your concussion...
There are so many things that would come back to haunt me if I ran for President someday.
like that video of you mad stoned vomiting in the bdubs parking lot after going to a pizza buffet screaming how you needed to make room for froyo
Wat
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
Gay bathhouses. They're actually a thing. So god does exist. And he doesn't hate me as much as you think he does
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So his 25th anniversary post of love to his wife was almost verbatim what he said to me last week. Does that mean I win or lose?
They won't let me buy alcohol in the airport until 9am. Super judgemental
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
My weirdest encounter with a stranger though was when for some reason they just gave me a box of unopened socks. Needless to say, I never used them.
The cat hopped on my bed and watched me masturbate naked with a vibrator. I've never felt more sorry in my entire life
She called a 10 year old handsome and we gave her a look that was equal parts confused and “what the hell is wrong with you”
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