you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
maybe next time you shouldn't be drinking alone watching intervention at 3 am and no one would think you needed an intervention.
You're asking the wrong person. I was drunk on nyquil and jager.
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Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
There's a mouse. In the house. By the cans. With some pans. Release the cat. To eat his hat. Sorry about the mess. Of my breakfest.
No but seriously, there's a fucking mouse in the house by the beer cans
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
Aaaaand now he just flexed his muscles at me and said "I'm a fucking eagle!"
Apparently she almost had an affair at Outback Steakhouse, details to follow when I get home but the apple really doesn't fall far from the tree
You brought string cheese to the strip club
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
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