we have officially lost it.
I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
is wine microwaveable?
The coffee from our coffee maker just hasn't tasted normal since we made Mac n cheese in it that one time....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
that's why i use the vibrator in the tanning bed. multitasking. plus then my rooms doesnt know how pathetic of a life i lead.
Also I'd like you to set a calendar reminder that goes off every day for you to take 2 minutes to think about what your life would be like without me.
I'm going to practice throwing things up the the air and catching them between my boobs, because that seems like a cool party trick.
you are never too drunk for berry picking
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He is sitting on the foor in the soup aisle saying "to each their own soup"
No more morning sex. Just for once, my vagina would like to go to work bone-dry and bone-free.
I'm fucking a man old enough to be my father who is also dating my boss. What have you done with your life?
"Local woman assaults strangers with sex toy" is a headline I never want to be about me.
Did we actually play with swords last night or did I dream that?
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
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