Porn is love you can see.
They told me I spent half the night at the club with one ball hanging out my shorts. Apparently it got me 1 free drink, 2 numbers, and thrown out.
seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
why didn't you say something constructive like "stop chugging that vodka"?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it bad that I had sex with another guy on my boyfriend's bed while he's out of town?
Just flip the mattress, it erases all
Done and done
hey dont come home for a while, moms drunk and is telling the story of 'how she met dad at that orgy' again
Just picked them up. It took 6 holes and a handle of rum to evolve from golf to a demolition derby.
There's an entire pit crew of cart boys surveying the golf cart destruction.
The stoned girl at the dining hall just handed me a single chicken wing and insisted that she's "unable to procure more rations"
I gave the naked guy in the hotel a pop tart. He stopped crying.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just had a heart to heart with my John Belushi poster.
Who takes their shirt off at the bar?! Classy broad
I do. In all fairness there was someone else's blood on it.
So the girl I met at the bar last night came home with me. Played with my puppy. And left.
I have successfully trained your dog to bring me pudding cups!
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
He made me come so hard I punched another hole in the wall mid orgasm.
I'm not fixing this one for you. Do it your own damn self.
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